All Dressed Up with Nowhere to Go

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Let’s face it, at some point or another we’ve all experienced the sting of being stood up for a date. The circumstances may vary, but the result is the same; you’ve taken the time and effort, and in some cases gone to expense, to put together your very best outfit, you’ve spent a good amount of time on your hair and makeup and you are eagerly anticipating whatever the evening holds. Then you sit yourself down and await the call or the car to arrive. The agreed upon time comes and goes, yet there you sit, all dolled up, still waiting. If you are like me, you may even wait far past the point where it’s obvious he isn’t going to show – eventually becoming angry at both him for being thoughtless and yourself for continuing to hold on to that tiny bit of hope.

Well dear readers, this very thing happened to me this evening. As embarrassing as it is to admit, this is not the first, second…or third time something like this has happened to me. Every now and then I go against my better judgement and find myself attracted to the type of men who don’t know how to pick up a phone to let me know their plans have changed (simple concept right?) But since this is a beauty related blog and not a place for bad relationship advice, I will tell you how I turned a negative evening into an opportunity for some self care and some much needed self love.

After I finally realized tonight wasn’t happening, I took an inventory of my skin and hair care supplies. I realized that this would be an excellent opportunity to try out some of the new beauty products I had acquired over the past week. I had received a Vox Box product from Influenster with a full size sample of L’Oreal Ever Creme. It’s a 6in1 cleansing balm for “dry damaged hair”, which fits the current situation on top of my head perfectly. I also picked up a skin care set at Sephora today by Belif – it was one of their “Winter Moisture Land” kits that they still had in stock from Christmas. It came with their Aqua bomb moisturizer, Hungarian water essence, and Creamy cleansing foam.
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Bringing my new finds with me, I ran a nice warm shower with a few drops of grapefruit oil on the shower floor for an instant mood lift. I washed my hair with the cleansing balm and immediately felt how soft my curls were becoming from the moisture injection – they sprang back to life. I then washed my face with the creamy cleansing foam which took care of the rest of my makeup and cleansed thoroughly. After I finished my shower and dried off, I added a very small amount of the Ever Creme to my hair as a leave in conditioner. I then used the toner and moisturizers included in my skin care kit.
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I now finish writing this blog entry feeling stress free from the comfort of my bed with soft supple skin and hair that feels repaired and smells wonderful. I would encourage any woman who has been through a similar experience to turn to self love, taking the time to care for yourself as it can do wonders to lift your spirits. It is a much better alternative to letting yourself waste any more time lamenting over someone who, to be honest, wasn’t worth your time in the first place. You will always attract people who treat you the way you treat and value yourself, so why not choose to start loving yourself right here and now so that next time you can spot a waste of time from a mile away. Please don’t evet forget you are all goddesses and you are worthy of being treated as such and should accept nothing less. I thank you for taking this journey with me this evening.

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Natural Hair – The Struggle

A little while ago, I wrote about how happy I was to be going natural with my hair. In fact, when my one year “natural anniversary” came around in April – I felt like a new woman. I had made it a full year without putting any harsh straightening chemicals in my hair – I felt like I could conquer the world!

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Fast forward just under six months later, and my elation and excitement about being natural has begun to wane a bit. Don’t get me wrong, I am still very happy and proud of myself for staying off the creamy crack for such a long period of time. The problem is, I don’t know what I’m supposed to do next. Do I cut it and rock a short natural doo, or do I continue to let it grow and try to get like some of my hair crushes with long beautiful natural tresses. In the meantime, I am not doing my hair justice by keeping it in pinned up twists 24/7 that usually end up with fuzzy edges – BORING.

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Some days I am so close to walking around the corner to CVS and getting myself a Dark n Lovely relaxer kit, turning off the phone, closing the curtains and blinds and just slathering it all over my head . Other days I just want to break out the clippers, chop it all off and start over. In this journey, I am discovering that there is so much more than just going natural. I thought I would stop relaxing and that would be the end all be all of my story. But I am here to tell those of you just starting out or maybe considering it – that when these women talk about their “natural journey”, that is exactly what it is, a journey that is ever evolving.

Even though I have had my temptations to undo all the progress I have made,  I do not regret it for one second. No matter what style I embrace next or when putting in the extra work that I now realize is required for proper care, I have ultimately taken a huge step in rediscovering myself. I love washing my hair and seeing the true texture that God has blessed me with. When putting in the good smelling natural oils and creams that I make or buy, I know that I am nourishing my hair and scalp rather than stripping it.

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So yes, this is a journey that I, and I’m sure many others struggle with from time to time – but at the end of the day, I know it is an investment in myself and that I am revealing the person I was meant to be.

And I most certainly do not miss those chemical burns on my scalp due to my hair dresser running her mouth while I sat in the chair squirming!

DIY Hair Gel!

So I have been on this natural hair journey for a while now, but only in the last 8 months have I been giving it a serious try. By “serious”, I mean I am no longer claiming to be a Naturalista while secretly using a texturizer – I’m all in this time. During this process, I have discovered many new ways to care for my hair without emptying my wallet. One crucial way has been to start make some of my own hair products. Doing this allows me to not only save money, but it also satisfies the control freak in me by letting me monitor exactly what goes onto my hair. Today, I will share with you the very first recipe I ever tried – which also happens to be the easiest to make; flaxseed hair gel.

You will need the following items:

1/3 cup whole flaxseeds
2 cups water
Small sauce pan
Mesh strainer (nylon wig cap or pantyhose without runs can sub in a pinch)
Mason jar or heavy plastic container with lid
Pot holder
Grapefruit or Lavender essential oil (optional)

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Step one: Pour water and flaxseeds into your pan over medium heat and boil, stirring occasionally. When you see a frothy egg-white consistency, remove from heat but continue to stir for 3-5 more minutes. Mixture should still be hot but not so much so that it will crack or jeopardize your container.

Step two: Place mesh strainer over the mouth of your clean jar/container. In a pinch, you could use a wig cap or pantyhose to strain, however it will be messy and hot – so I really recommend using the mess strainer if you have one.

Step three: Start to pour or spoon gel mixture into strainer. Gel will thicken as it cools, so try to do this quickly (but safely).

Step four (optional): After filling a container with strained gel, add a couple of drops of an essential oil you like to give the mixture and your hair a nice subtle fragrance. I usually alternate between lavender and grapefruit oil.

Now you’re done! Just put the lid on and stick it in the fridge. You can also refrigerate the flaxseeds you just used to make another batch. Both should keep about 15 days if kept cold.

Don’t fret and call me a liar if your first batch isn’t quite as easy as I’ve implied, it may take a little trial and error at first. However, once you find your rhythm you will wonder why you ever paid money for drying hair gels that left your hair hard and crunchy! Flaxseed gel is both moisturizing and nourishing and great for setting and styling.

I hope you have enjoyed and found some inspiration from this tutorial and I encourage you to leave a comment below to let me know how your batch turns out!

Good Hair Vs Bad Hair

I happened across the following pic on Instagram today and it made me think…
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True, this is a joke (which did serve to make me giggle a bit), but it also called to mind the “good hair vs bad hair” myth. I say myth, because that’s exactly what the concept of one race having “better” hair than another is.

HEALTHY hair is GOOD hair. Just my 2 cents for the day.

Love yourselves beauties and embrace that beautiful inner you!

Instagram: @faces_by_brit